Not Long After
by AllonsyMew
Summary: 3 years ago, due to misunderstanding, Onodera Ritsu and Saga Masamune broke off their relationship and went their separate ways. Ritsu to England and Saga to Shikoku. But after graduating high school, Saga returns to Tokyo for university. So what happens when Ritsu turns up as a first year? What will become of the two? ((Nostalgia story mostly, but there will be Trifecta as well))
1. Prologue

**Author's Note: Yay! New story! Even though I'm in the middle of 2 already, I promised in my other story "All I ever do" that I would post something sweet and romantic and fluffy next, and I had this idea last night while doing a whole bunch of thinking, and I wrote it down, then wrote the prologue, so I decided to write it out and publish it today since I am actually looking forward to this story. I have a lot of "what if"s in my mind... yep.**

**So I hope you enjoy this story!**

**Disclaimer: This is fanfiction. All characters in the story are the work of Nakamura Shungiku-San. **

* * *

**Ristu's POV:**

_Back then , everything was so white and pure. There was never a time in my life where I was happier than that little time that we were together. I loved him so much, and all I could have hoped for was him loving me back, just as much, maybe even more than I did. I wish that the time we spent together could last for eternity, that I would never have to wake up from that amazing dream come true. _

_However, the universe doesn't work that way. _

_I remember it clearer than any other memories combined. _

_"Senpai," I had said cheerfully and innocently, with this dopey smile on my face, "We're going out now. Right?"_

_"Huh?" he had answered. _

_"Well, it's just that you never said anything." I had held my open shirt together with my hands, squeezing the fabric lightly. _

_"Do you... love me? ... Senpai?"_

_He didn't say anything, but he breathed through his nose, stifling a laugh._

_'He laughed at me' I thought, and my smile erased right then and there. 'Was he... playing with me?'_

_Then, I just kicked him and ran away, before he could say anything. _

_I couldn't care less what was going on around me, I just ran off. I couldn't stop myself, and before I knew it, I was on a plane to England, and transferred into a high school there._

_I spent the next 3 years of my life studying abroad, and trying my best to forget, but I always found myself thinking back._

_Then a phone call came. My mother forced me to return home, telling me it would be in my best interest to attend university in Japan. I had tried to protest, but this is my mother I'm talking about, it was no use, and I was forced to come home._

_So here I am now. I, Onodera Ritsu, age 18, completely jaded, and now a first year student at Tokyo University._

* * *

**Author's Note: So here we go. Brand new story. Onodera is a young adult, but just what is Senpai up to? ****Until Next Time!**


	2. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: Hey Guys! **

**Thank you so much for reviewing my story, "Not Long After"! **

**Replies:**

**The-Bad-W0lf: Thank You! It's cool to know someone else had a story simlar to this in mind. But I think you should Publish your story! I would totally be the first to read it. BTW I LOVE your username!**

**Windying: HaHa I'm glad you are excited for this story. I am too! And that "Oohh my"... was that supposed to be a Mr. Sulu reference? :)**

**AkiLife: Thank you! I'm excited for this story too. I really think it's going to turn out good!**

**FlyingKey123: I thank you for the nice feedback! I am actually really trying to make this like a what if thing. Because I came up with the idea while rewatching the show. I'm trying to incorporate as much of the original series within the story as possible but still make original. I swear this story will be awesome! I hope you continue reading!**

**SekaiRomanticaYaoiGirl: Yes. Ritsu is jaded! It's cause he still experience the break up with Saga which is what caused him to be jaded in the first place. And Arigatou for saying my story is awesome! :)**

**Thank you for the Awesome feedback guys! I hope you continue reading!**

**And now For Chapter 1:**

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**Onodera's POV**

**4:00 PM. Thursday, April 11th.**

"UGH!"

I slumped onto the bed in the small, boxed filled, apartment that I just moved into.

The Entrance ceremony was a total drag. I do not enjoy crowds, and my socializaion skills aren't exactly up to par. In all honesty, I didn't have to go to the entrance ceremony, but I felt it was the most appropriate option. Though I'm not very social, I do believe first impressions are important, and to come off as a slacker to professors and other students is not in my best interest. So I attended, and was able to speak to a student advisor and several other students. They all seemed nice enough, but I'm not interested in forming relationships.

After all I've been through, I've lost the desire to get close to anyone in any relationships. Not after all of that happened. I've just become so jaded that getting close to anyone has been pretty impossible.

And it's his fault.

Senpai's fault.

"Senpai... " I sighed into my pillow.

'DAMMIT! SNAP OUT OF! STOP THINKING ABOUT THAT GUY! HE BROKE YOUR HEART! AND BESIDES! YOU CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER HIS FACE.' The voice in my head snapped at me.

It was right. Why bother remembering someone whose face you can't even remember? Especially when that person brought all of your pain upon you.

I sighed again. I was too exhausted from talking and forcing smiles all day to even think properly. I just wanted to crawl into bed and hide from the world and everything and everyone in it.

But I couldn't do that because I had to unpack things. I had moved into this room no less than a week ago, and still haven't unpacked anything. I just had boxes sitting all over the place,

I really had to unpack. Living in a room surrounded by smelly cardboard was not very comfortable.

*** * * * * * * * * * ***  
**6:00 PM, The Same day. **

Unpacking was easy enough. About half the boxes were filled with books, and the rest were just things I needed for everyday life. That plus the standard school-provided furniture, and my room was absolutely average. I'm not the type to personalize. I had what I needed and nothing else (unless you count the endless amount of books.) It was easier that way for myself.

After putting everything away and getting a bit more settled with the place, I collapsed back onto my bed, wishing I could die.

I had a nice long session of just lying there before my stomach interrupted me with a long, loud growl. Come to think of it, I was too caught in my full day to really acknowledge my empty stomach and I was really hungry. But I didn't have any food and cooking is a hassle.

UGH. I groaned. 'I'll just eat out again' I thought, and left to eat at a nearby Izakaya.

* * *

**Author's Note: Yeah... not much of a cliffhanger. But I swear this story will get better!**

**Until next time!**


	3. Chapter 2

**Author's Note: Hey Guys! So finally, a nice long detailed chapter! Most of it is in Saga's Point of View. This chapter took forever to write but It was worth it! I now give you Chapter 2!**

**WARNING**: **Harsh** **Language** **and** **Mature** **Scenes**.** (Partial Lemon**)** Sort of like** **in the anime. **

**Also contains intensely deep metaphors. (Lots of them)**

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**Saga's POV**

Another Night, Another Conquest.

Once again, I find myself in this familiar scenario that I have lately become accustomed to; waking up in an unfamiliar room, lying in bed next to a complete stranger. I glanced to my right to see the person next to me. A guy this time.

Not that it really matters. I really don't care. I've done it with guys before. I've done it with girls before. Man or Woman, It didn't make a difference to me.

But. . . . . . . . . . .

What did make a difference to me. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

None of them were him.

None of them were Oda Ritsu.

It's been about 3 years since Ritsu. My Ritsu, had disappeared off the face of the Earth. And it was just, without warning. One day, we were together, awkward, book-wormish, idiotic. . . . . . . and helplessly, desperately in love, then the next thing I knew, he just fucking kicked me from behind, ran off, and I never saw him again.

I guess I really couldn't help the fact that I was an idiot. I just... loved him... so much.

He was the only person in the world I ever cared about.

To tell the truth though. My life is pretty fucked up. And I can tell you now that it has been nothing but absolute shit.

Almost nothing.

Really, up until the start of high school, my life was okay, I guess. I had a family, and I had books, which was pretty much all I needed.

But then the fights broke out.

My parents stopped talking to each other, except to fight. They were always strict and proper and stern, but when they began fighting, our household had become more hostile than ever, It was run as if it were a boot camp... a very silent and ignorant bootcamp.

Which sort of leads into another thing.

I spent a lot of time thinking, and many times, I find myself comparing the way my life has been so far, to one of those battlefield stories in war novels.

For a long period of time, that battlefield is peaceful and easy. No fights. No quarrels. And the field is calm and beautiful in a way. And you wish it would remain such.

But then war breaks out.

You fight battle after battle, but you can never seem to resolve the conflict, as it constantly strips you of all hope.

And when it seems as though all hope is lost, the protagonist of the story appears.

The hero rises.

And it's sudden. he just appears out of nowhere, starting off as one of the background characters that seem to be useless. Always watching from afar, never interferring. Never confronting what lies ahead, until it strikes him, and forces him to confront the battle. The hero, as I call it, fights the battle alongside you on that battlefield, and hope returns.

That hero brings beauty to the battlefield, brings you from the shadows to rise, and you feel triumphant at last.

But like all good stories, it has to come to an end.

So when that hero vanishes from the fight,

You are forced to face a battle more brutal and more terrible and more petrifying than anything you have ever faced.

That battle is;

Facing the war alone,

Living your story without your hero.

From there, my story has been a roller coaster that only goes down *

And I'll admit, I've just lost the will to fight that battle any longer.

In the end, my parents divorced, and I was forced to move to Shikoku* with my mother. And I stayed until the end of high school. Then I moved back to Tokyo for Uni'. For about a year, I was living on my own, in one of the school-provided rooms. But after I entered my second year, I moved into an apartment with one of my friends, Yokozawa Takafumi.

Yokozawa... now that's a story that is a bit more complicated. For now, let's just say that our relationship as of now is as good friends.

*** * * * * * * * * * **

I moved from the stranger's bed to collect my clothes, which were scattered around the room along with his, I managed to get them without waking the guy up, which I'm sure was easy enough since neither of us really feel asleep until about 5:00 AM. We had kept each other up really late.

I made my way out of the apartment and tried to find my way home. The guy was a student apparently, since he was living in a dormitory. I knew my way home from the campus because I lived about a mile from the campus.

I walked until I made it to the building where I lived. It was 11:00, so Yokozawa would probably be in class by now. School had started up again for 2 years and up, whereas the first years had the entrance ceremony. I decided I would just not go to class today. It was normal for me to be absent last year, and this year shouldn't make a difference.

* * * * * * * *  
6:00 PM. The same day.

After hours of laying around my place just reading and antisocializing, I realized how hungry I was. I was too lazy to cook, so I decided to just go to the izakaya* nearby that I go to a lot.

30 minutes later.

I walked into the familiar bar, inhaling the smell of alcohol that I've gotten used to. There weren't that many people there. 2 couples were sitting at tables, and there was a small group of students hanging around, drinking and singing into microphones, then there was this brown-haired guy sitting at the bar, with 4 empty glasses by him.

I took the seat next to the guy, and ordered a beer.

'kanpai...' I said to myself drowsily, and took a long drink.

I tried to get a closer look at the guy next to me. His hair was sort of long, for a guy at least. The brown color seemed really familiar.

Sort of Like Ritsu's hair.

His bangs covered his eyes, and his face was really red. 'Probably dead drunk.' I thought.

"Hey." I said to the guy, already starting to feel the alcohol take effect.

"Heello..." the guy spit out. flailing his hands up. His voice was sort of high-pitched. Definetly not sober...

"What brings you here?" ... not my best line. Too cheesy, but I just didn't care. I needed to make conversation with someone.

"*Hiccup*" He just raises his glass up to his face and points to it. "Drinks. *Hiccup*" He's a pretty bad drunk, I guess. "Hoow 'bout- Hic- youu?"

I point to my glass, and nod. I took another gulp. The glass was empty, and I rose it and asked for a refill. I drank it in one gulp, and rose it again.

10 minutes and 20 more drinks later, and I started to slur my words. I continued talking to the brown haired guy about nothing in particular. Well, being drunk and all, it was sort of impossible to have a proper conversation. We talked about the noise in the room and the weather and all this stupid stuff. It felt awkward, but I didn't mind. I was sort of just thinking about taking him home. If you know what I mean.

After another 15 minutes, we both wordlessly got up and walked together. I looked down to him, but it was blurry. He was sort of just slumping along like an idiot. Before he could fall over, I grabbed his hand. When I touched it, I couldn't help but think how small his hand was. It felt almost similar to Ritsu's hand.

"D-DOOOONN'D" He yelled, but I just kept holding his hand.

I'm not sure if it's the alcohol or just my imagination, but there was something about this guy I couldn't help but find myself being drawn to. He seemed so familiar. I want to get to know this guy a little bit more.

* * * * * * * *

I got us to my place safe enough. The second we made it through the door, I just smashed my lips onto his, not really thinking.

"WH-WHAAT ARREYOU DOIN?" the guy yelled at me.

"Sorry, But just…. stay over tonight."

The guy blushed even redder, not from the alcohol.

He looked down and nodded. "-Kayy" he slurred out.

I took him to my room, and kissed him roughly again as I threw him and myself onto my bed. Probably due to the alcohol, he kissed me back, opening his mouth.

When I felt his mouth open, out of reflex, I shoved my tongue into the guy's mouth.

'_He tastes like beer'_ I thought. The thought made me kiss him harder.

I felt around for his hand, and grabbed it again. I interlocked our fingers while my tongue circled around his.

This guy. He seemed so familiar. I know that the possibility of this guy being Ritsu was impossible but I couldn't care less. I want to remember him. I want to find him. I want him. I love him.

And here I am using this guy for a substitute.

I coudn't help but imagine that this guy was Ritsu, my Ritsu, as I stripped his shirt off of him. I just forgot everything else. Suddenly, I am 17 again, and right under me, was my Ritsu.

I leaned down and kissed him again, but gentler this time. I was surprised when he grabbed hold of the back of my head. He laced his fingers into my hair, like Ritsu used too.

It was too much.

"Ritsu" I called out the name of the one I missed so badly. Not caring if the guy would hit me or something when I called out a name that probably did not belong to him. But he just locked his fingers tighter in my hair. He whispered something I couldn't hear.

"Huh?" I asked. The alcohol was beginning to wear off on me, enough for me to see that the guy had fallen asleep. I gave up then and fell asleep too.

*** * * * * ***

Ritsu's POV:

This is crazy. Why am I letting this guy do this to me?

That guy I had met at the bar, without asking, had taken me to his place. And the second we had gotten inside, he kissed me!

'I don't want this. Not after what happened with Senpai.' But I was fucking drunk, and my body refused to listen to my head.

Now here I am in bed with another man. It felt like I was betraying Senpai. But this guy seemed strange. When he kissed me, as he touched me, I couldn't stop my heart from beating like crazy. It was almost as if... He reminded me of Saga-Senpai... And I allowed myself to get swept away by him.

"Ritsu" I heard him say.

I know it was my imagination. I never told this guy my name, but even so, the thought of hearing him say my name like that. So sweetly, but almost painfully, I couldn't help but think of Saga.

Without thinking, I whispered the name of the person I long to be with. Even if he hurt me. Deep in my heart, I still longed for him.

"Senpai."

* * *

***Shikoku: one of the four Major residential Islands of Japan. In the Manga, Takano has to move to the Kagawa Prefecture in Shikoku with his mother after his parents divorced. (mentioned in Sekaiichi Hatsukoi Manga: Chapter 14 of Onodera Ritsu no Baai)**

***izakaya: Japanese Bar. Place to drink, eat, and sing Karaoke. Very good for social gatherings, birthday parties, etc. KANPAI!)**

**Yay! Things are starting to get interesting. I told you guys that I was excited for this story. I hope you guys look forward to new chapters because this story will probably be really long. (40+ Chapters)**

**I hope you have great days/nights!**

**Please review. And if you have any questions, feel free to ask. **

**-Until Next Time!**


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N: Hey Guys! I'm really sorry for not updating for a few days. I really was supposed to have this up 2 days ago, but I left the notebook that had my draft in it at school, and I finally remembered it today.**

**And Now to reply to reviews:**

**Sekaifangirl83: I was actually planning to do this. Since right now I'm just introducing the romance the only characters I am using currently are Onodera, Takano/Saga, and Yokozawa. I don;t like introducing a whole bunch of characters at once. It's sort of a gradual thing with me, but I will introduce more characters as I go. I actually plan to have this story really long. I plan on having Misaki, Hiroki, and Sumi from Junjou Romantica, but I'm not sure any of the other Hatsukoi charcters would really fit. Maybe a cameo or something. But I will try! **

**Akta-Jane: SUMIMASEN SUMIMASEN SUMIMASEN! I know I write sort of short chapters, but I'm just starting off. I swear soon, chapters will get longer, or I will try updating more often. I hope you understand!**

**April952: Thank you for saying you love my story! Ready to see their reactions? Read this chapter... and please excuse me, I need to fangirl: OMG OMG! I'M SUCH A HUGE FAN OF YOU! You are like one of my favorite writers on ! I love "Black Angel Raven" and "My Angel" and your "Romeo and Romeo: University" actually partially inspired me to write this story. Thank you so much for the review! It means a lot!**

**Okay, enough rambling:**

**Time for Chapter 3!**

* * *

**_Ritsu's POV:_**

This situation...

I remember going out to the izakaya last night to have a drink or two... or more. And I remember talking to that guy there...

But after that...

Gulp...

I remember everything.

And I mean everything.

I can remember the feel of his touch.

His kissing.

His undressing.

And then... he... My face flooded with red at the thought.

'Who was that guy?' I thought.

I looked around the unfamiliar room, which I assumed belonged to the guy. I tried to remember his face. I racked my brain trying to figure it out. I guess I never really saw his face.

Just then he walked in, holding a cigarette.

"You're up." he stated in a monotone, and leaned against the doorway.

I looked down, unable to meet his gaze. Not after what we did last night. What I did. I betrayed Saga Senpai with some guy whose name I don't even know. My heart was beating like crazy.

"I... uh... yeah." I stuttered. "I-I apologize for last night. I'm not usually the kind of person to impose on someone else's home. I'll just go now. " I pulled the sheet off from my body getting ready to stand and take my leave, when I felt a breeze.

I wasn't wearing any clothes.

Fuck.

Noticing this immediately, I rushed around the room like a tornado and managed to find and put on the clothes I had worn yesterday.

I stood there facing him for less than half a second, when I collapsed to my knees. My back was aching terribly.

_Just who did this guy think he was? _

I sat back down on his bed. He was still standing there, watching me act like a total idiot.

I looked down quickly.

I then looked up through my long-ish bangs to get a better look at him. He was tall, and had broad shoulders, unlike me, who was short, thin, and dull looking. He had really dark brown hair, that it could be mistaken for black. I couldn't get a good look at his face since his hair was covered most of it. His features seemed...

Familiar.

Since I was fully clothed, I realized there was no real reason for me to stay here, so I walked towards him.

"I'm sorry for overstaying. Last night was a mistake. I'll take my leave now." I said, trying to pass him so I could go home.

But he blocked the door with his long arm, with his fist against the wall.

I was trapped.

"Wait," he said roughly, but then, his voice shifted, when he said, "Don't go." he sounded desperate.

He grabbed me by the arm and turned me to face him, and he pinned me against the wall. He took me by the shoulders next and squeezed them tightly. I tried, but couldn't meet his gaze.

"Umm, hey... can I... uhm... please let me g-go." I said. I'm sure he could hear my heart pounding. This was not supposed to happen. Even though he had hurt me so long ago, all I could imagine being with was Senpai. Not this guy who I didn't even know.

I guess that didn't matter to him though, because not a minute later, he leaned in and crushed his lips against mine.

My eyes widened, as I realized what was happening. I tried to pull away or push him back, but every time I tried he just held me tighter, and deepened our kiss.

Why was he doing this to me? We don't even know each other.

I finally gained enough strength to pull away from the kiss. By the time I had, both of us were panting hard He had not given either of us a chance to breathe during the whole thing.

"We...hah... we can't do this sort of thing together." I said.

"Why?" he questioned?

I closed my eyes and squeezed my eyes shut.

"I...we.. I-I can't betray him. I can't betray Senpai." I said.

WHOOSH!

Then it all happened at once. There was a rush, and a powerful force, that pushed me down onto the hard, wooden floors. I was pinned down against the floor. I looked up to see the guy staring right at me. Looking right into my eyes. I looked up to finally meet his gaze. Doing exactly what he was doing, and looked straight into his eyes.

His eyes...

They were... a golden hazel.

They were...

Senpai's eyes.

He then widened those golden eyes... with shock?

Just who is this guy?

I looked at his face. All I could see was this shocked expression. His face...

"Ritsu." he said.

Ritsu?

How does he know my name?

How could he possibly know my name?

And then it hit me.

It hit me hard in the chest. Like a ton of bricks.

"Oh my God." I said.

This guy... he was...

"S-Senpai?"

* * *

**Author's Note:... Yeah... this chapter was pretty short. About 800+ words. I really wanted it to be longer, but no matter how much I tried, when I tried to describe stuff, I just got lost and had to erase it... and erasing with pen is pretty hard. Then when I was editing this, I got lost again... My mind wanders a lot. If you met me in real life, our relationship would basically involve me ignoring you and everyone else. I'm a bad friends... but that's what the internet is for!****I guess that's all for now!**

**~Until Next Time!~**


	5. Chapter 3 and a Half

**Author's Note: Greetings! I deeply apologize for not updating this story sooner, but I read all you reviews and Thank you so much! You guys are the sweetest. I really appreciated you comments and reviews and such! **

**So this chapter is basically going to be chapter 3 in Saga's POV. But there is going to be a flashback from his past as well to emphasize a bit on his own feelings toward the situation. It took me forever to write. I didn't intend to write this chapter at first. But in a review from April952, she said that Saga knew it was Ritsu already when he told him not to leave. This is incorrect however, so I thought I would write this to explain what is going through Saga's head through this whole Thing**

**((BTW: This chapter includes material from the doujinshi "Sekaiichi Hatsukoi: In My Kingdom of Loneliness." Rights of any lines from that doujinshi are full credit to the creator.))**

**Disclaimer: I don't Own Sekaiichi Hatsukoi or "In my Kingdom of Loneliness. The Link to the doujinshi is right here:**

** manga/sekaiichi_hatsukoi_in_my_kingdom_of_loneliness/**

**And now for Chapter 3.5:**

* * *

When I woke up the next morning, I found myself in that oh-so familiar situation of waking up in bed with someone whom I just met. It wasn't anything new.

But this time I felt like there was something different.

As I looked down at the sleeping man next to me...

I just...

Couldn't get over how similar he looked to Ritsu...

He had his hair.

His petite-ness

His Face.

This guy…..

Go ahead and call me crazy, but when I look at this person, my heart starts pounding, and I feel like I'm on the edge of tears. All I could see beyond this man's sleeping face,

Was Ritsu.

My Ritsu.

I closed my eyes and leaned back on the wall as the memories started flooding my head.

Flashback:

_"Oda Ritsu?" The boy looked at me with a perplexed expression, "You sure you don't mean 'Onodera'?"_

"No," I replied with certainty. "Oda."

I stood outside of a first year room, 1-C. The boy was the class representative. I had asked him and all the other First-year reps about Ritsu, who seemed to up-and disappear. I had spent the time since trying to get in touch with him.

But that was a challenge.

There was literally nothing left of him. No way whatsoever of contacting him. I couldn't call him because he didn't have a phone. I couldn't ask his parents because I didn't know where he lived or what his parents did. I tried asking the Teachers but they told me 'Oda Ritsu' did not exist.

No matter show hard I tried, or where I looked, or how frantically I searched, I couldn't find any trace of Oda Ritsu.

'Have I. . . . . Finally lost it' I thought.

I was starting to believe that it was all a dream.

As I walked home that day, as I opened the door to my house, sneaking past my parents who were once again quarreling, as I shut the door to my room, as I collapsed onto the bed, the only thing. . . . . . . to cross my mind. . . . . was Ritsu.

**"Senpai.**" A voice said, **"Saga-Senpai"**

I looked to my side, to see him. Lying there. With that gentle smile on his cute face.

"Ritsu." My voice sounded scratched up, but that didn't matter. What mattered now was that Ritsu was here, right in front of me.

I reached towards him, to feel his warmth.

But all I felt was air.

Maybe I really was dreaming.

Maybe all I'd had with him….. had just been some weird hallucination.

All the memories of him flooding my mind.

"**I- I love you. . . . Senpai.**"

'Why….?'

**"They're interesting though, right?"**

'You're the one who said you loved me.'

**"It's a long story. It would take three days to tell."**

'I'd pretended not to notice…...'

**"I think even just getting some of it out will help you release some frustration from your body."**

'Until you went…..'

**"If it will mean Saga-Senpai's not lonely, I'll go!"**

'and said you loved me. '

**"Because you're you."**

That's when the tears started flowing.

"Am I crying?" I asked myself, feeling the wet droplets slowly making their way down my face. I touched my cheek, to feel the wet trail of emotion the tears left behind.

Normally I'm okay. Normally I hide my emotions. Normally I'm so strong.

But now…..

My vulnerability is finally showing through. After all this time I've held it in, it's finally coming out.

My silent sobs shifted into loud cries of pain and sorrow.

I couldn't hold it anymore. One moment more, I would have broken. Shattered into so many pieces, that repair would be impossible. One moment more, and I would have lost everything I had left.

Not that I had much to begin with.

My life was awful now that I really think about it. My parents had never once been there for me, or cared enough to be there. They were never around. And when they were, they were too focused on each other, Fighting, to even realize I was there.

Until Ritsu showed up.

His smile, his voice, his kindness, his love.

Everything about him.

It all brought me out of the darkness that I had so long called my life.

I thought that finally, finally, I had found something in this world worth living for.

And it all disappeared in the blink of an eye.

'It's hurts so much,' I thought, clutching on to my shirt.

The joy…. of being loved by someone.

I never thought, that, once in my life, would I ever feel as happy as I did when I was with Ritsu.

It's my first time….. feeling so many feelings… that I just had means to cope.

When I first met him, I never thought I would ever come to fall so hard for him…..

and now… he's gone...

End of Flashback. 

I sighed at the memory as I looked down at the guy from last night once again.

"Damn." I thought. "They look too much alike."

You don't think that…...

Maybe….

Maybe…...

Then again, what are the chances that this guy really is the Oda Ritsu I knew and loved not so long ago? (That felt like a lifetime ago)

I sighed again as I got out of the bed to get dressed.

I collected the clothes that I had worn yesterday that had been scattered across the room, and tossed them in a small pile of dirty clothes. Then I got on some new clothes. I'd left his stuff on the floor, figuring that he would probably want it back as soon as he woke up. Something tells me that his reaction won't be pretty.

When I was fully clothed, I left the room to make some coffee.

The apartment was dark and quiet. I looked toward the genkan* to see that There were only two pairs of shoes there. Mine and the guy's.

I guess Yokozawa didn't come home last night.

'Probably hooked up with some chick," I thought.

I made and drank the coffee as quickly as possible. I wasn't really sure why I was in such a hurry, but I continued to rush myself anyway as I drained the cup of black coffee.

When the mug was empty, I lit a cigarette and decided to head back to my bedroom. The guy was probably awake by now. It was somewhere around 8.

'I should probably ask for his name.' I thought. It would at least clear up any suspicions I had of this guy being Ritsu."

When I opened the door, I entered the room to find him sitting upright on the bed with a worried and exhausted look on his face.

"You're up." I said flatly, blowing out a puff of smoke.

"I... uh... yeah." he said nervously….. familiar tone of voice….. "I-I apologize for last night. I'm not usually the kind of person to impose on someone else's home. I'll just go now." He removed the covers from his body only to look down at himself. His being completely naked. He then began to scramble about the room as he put his clothes on, then he collapsed back onto my bed.

….Quite the jaded personality he has…..

When he was dressed, he got up again from the bed. He started to walk but fell down to his knees.

It took a lot to hold in my laughter….

Did I really fuck him that hard last night?

He finally was able to stand up. He looked up towards me, but I couldn't get a glimpse of his eyes. I only now realized that I didn't even see his eyes last night or today.

Were they green like his?

Would it be enough to prove that this guy wasn't Ritsu?

"I'm sorry for overstaying. Last night was a mistake. I'll take my leave now." he said once more.

As he was making his way to the door, the look of worry and fear that I had seen on his face not long ago, came to my own face.

Without thinking, I slammed my hand on the door, blocking him from leaving.

"Wait," I said desperately. "Don't go."

I don't know what's wrong with me. I just…...

couldn't let him leave….. not yet.

I needed to know….. needed to make sure….. needed to see for myself.

Just who is this person?

I grabbed him by the arms, and pushed him against the wall, then took him by the shoulders to hold him steady. I tried to get a better look at him, but his hair covered his eyes once again, and he kept looking down…

"Umm, hey... can I... uhm... please let me g-go" he said, as he struggled to get away, but I wouldn't let him.

I don't know why I did it, or what drove me…. but not second later, I had crushed my lips onto his, closing my eyes as I did so.

At least I could do this much. Until I could figure this out. I at least wanted him here. Like this.

A few moments later, he began to struggle and managed to pull away. By the time he did so, we were both panting due to lack of breathing,

"We...hah... we can't do this sort of thing together."he said

"Why?" I asked him.

"I...we.. I-I can't betray him. I can't betray Senpai." I said.

Senpai?

_Senpai…._

_No way….._

**WHOOSH!**

I couldn't stop myself from there. I pushed him onto the floor, falling on top of him. I looked into his eyes.

His Green, green eyes.

_Way…._

This guy was him. He was…..

"Ritsu." I gasped.

He looked up into my eyes. One moment he was filled with fear and confusion. The next, shock.

He gasped.

"Oh my god." he said.

"Senpai?"

**Author's Note: And there you have it. I'm sorry it took so long. But I wrote the whole draft of this chapter in my Science Notebook at school. and I wrote between classes and in my free time, so I could't really find time to type it until yesterday and this morning. So I really hope you enjoyed this Chapter. **

**As for my other story, "All I ever do" I cannot really guarantee a day that I will get done writing the last chapter, because nothing really makes sense to me in it. I'm thinking of going back and rewriting the whole thing before adding Chapter 8. **

**Once again, I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Please review!? I want opinions!**

**Until Next Time!**


	6. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

**(A/N) 'Ello everyone! I'm so sorry I didn't upload this sooner. I had final exams and major writers block. Thank you for your patience, or rather, impatience. All your reviews included an "update soon!" So I guess not patience. Sorry! Okay, enough chit chat!**

**And now for Chapter 4! **

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**Onodera's POV:**

I couldn't believe it. This man is Saga-Senpai? My first love whose very existance I tried so hard and for so long to erase from my memories.

Why did I have to meet him again here?

Why the hell did this have to happen to me? After what he did to me back then... I have to meet him _again?_

And why - of all things, did I have to have _slept with him?!_!

Everything sucks.

I stared up at his shocked face. Definetely Saga. There was too much of a resemblence to put a different name to his face. Same long face. Same squared chin, same gentle features, same dark, messy hair, same beautiful... beautiful gold eyes...

_NO! Snap out of it! He hurt you! Remember? He's the reason you left Japan. The reason you became so jaded! _

Then...

'Now what?' I thought. 'What does this mean? What happens now?'

That was the obvious question. Now that I was stuck in this position, what do I do now? I can't just walk away. And no way in hell do I want to talk to him. I needed to get out of here. I needed to escape. Get away from him. But How? What do I say? What do I do? It's all just too confusing.

"Ritsu..." Saga repeated, "It's really you?"

It sounded as though his tone of voice was different. Before, he sounded so shocked. But now... his voice sounded scratchy, as if he were on the verge of tears? The sound of his voice broke my heart. As if it wasn't broken enough... By him...

Yeah. That's right! It's all his fault!

"S-Saga-Senpai... p-please... L-let me go." I said. Hoping it would work.

It didn't. For, not a second later, the man tightened his hold on me. Hugging me tightly to him. He brought his face closer to mine and rested his head on my shoulder.

No. No. No! I can't let this happen! I need to get away! I need to get home!

"S-Saga..." I said as I struggled to get free. I needed to leave. This cannot happen. I won't let it happen! Not again! I need to get out of here. To get away from this place. To get away from him. I need to. If not... I'll...

I'll what?

I don't even know anymore.

I finally managed to escape his grasp. I stood up and backed away from him. Panting hard from trying to get away.

"Wha-...What the hell is wrong with you?" I yelled angrily, "How... H-How dare you just announce yourself in front of me like that?! After doing such a horrible thing to me, how about apologizing, Huh?!"

Saga, who was still sitting on the floor, looked at me with confusion. "Horrible Thing?"

"Th-That's Right!"

"...I did to you?"

"Who else could I be talking about? Because of you, I..."

"Weren't you the one who did a horrible thing?"

"W-What?"

His face of confusion turned into a face of agression, as he said, "Who's the one who kicked me from behind and then disappeared without a word the next day?"

Kicked?

Huh?

I stood up straight

"Kicked you from behind? What are you talking about?"

"What the fuck? Guess you don't remember... Must be nice to have a selective memory. You're the worst.."

"Excuse me?! You must be talking about yourself. I mean... sure I was younger, but I really meant what I said... But you... You led me on and then threw me away!" I was getting pretty angry. First he kisses me, then he just announces himself out of nowhere, the kisses me again, then he puts me down even more?! Just who does he think he is? Sure he may be my first love, but that doesn't change the fact of what he did to me.

"Excuse me?" He asked. He sounded confused again, "When did I ever do that?"

I blushed and looked down. "When you laughed when I asked you how you felt about me!"

"Huh? I don't even remember that!"

And he says that I'M the one with the selective memory?

He continued, "Anyway, that doesn't mean anything. I was younger, and a teenager and a brat in high school. I mean, If I laughed, it was probably to hide my embarrassment."

He scoffed, "Ha. So you thought I was making fun of you? And that's why you kicked me and ran away? And you've held a grudge for almost 4 years? You. Are an Idiot."

I blushed redder, "You're the one who's the idiot!" Talk about mixed personality. First he begs me not to leave, now he's calling me an idiot!

He probably noticed the blush, because just then, he said, "So the mystery's finally solved." "Huh?" "So that means I can seduce you, right?"

"Huh?" What the hell is he going on about now?

He stood up and walked toward me.

"Maybe you won't believe me. But... No matter who I was with, I could never forget about about you. I don't care what you think, but you are it for me. And...I swear, One of these days, I am getting you back. No matter what it takes, I will get you to fall in love with me again. I will make you say you love me again. Just you wait."

My face turned 50 shades of red right then and there. He started walking to his kitchen.

"Who... Who the hell do you think you are?! Saga!"

"Oh yeah, One more thing. When I entered my senior year in high school, my parents got divorced and my name changed. It's not Saga anymore. It's Takano."

"Wh-Whatever. I'm leaving now!" I opened the door to exit his apartment. I stood still for a moment, trying to figure out how to get home. I looked to my left and my right. This hallway seemed oddly familiar. I turned around and looked at Saga- I mean Takano's door. His number plate read 1201 in a very familar font. Wait a minute... Isn't my apartment #1202?... Oh my God... NO!

I looked to my left, and there it was. Apartment #1202... This was my apartment building...

I walked over to the door the read 1202 and attempted to unlock it. And to my dismay, the door opened. No way in hell!

"Hey look, I guess we're neighbors." S-Takano's voice sounded amused. I looked at him. He was leaning against the wall with his arms folded.

"Ummmm I uhhh... Goodbye." I said sharply, entering the apartment that unfortunately, belonged to me. (Well, technically it's rented... but still)

When I enetered the apartment, I collapsed to my knees in the genkan. I put my hands to my face and tried to calm myself down.

Calm down. Just calm down.

"_Maybe you won't believe me. But... No matter who I was with, I could never forget about about you. I don't care what you think, but you are it for me. And...I swear, One of these days, I am getting you back. No matter what it takes, I will get you to fall in love with me again. I will make you say you love me again. Just you wait_."

God. No.

But...What does this mean? That I made a colossal misunderstanding? Could it be?

But...

My soul got all twisted and jaded when he laughed at me like that. Now he's saying it was nothing but a bit of nervous laughter?!

That was stupid though. How did I not notice it was him from the very start?

Then again... I was totally wasted at the time and my hair was covering my eyes and I couldn't process anything... then... what about him? Why didn't he recognize me? Damn these questions just keep popping out of the ground. It's driving me insane.

But then... what if?

What if what he said is true?

What if I did misunderstand?

Maybe... Maybe he did... love me?

Maybe he still does?

I mean... he did kiss me and all... and held me like that... and... gulp... that.

Does... Does that mean I can love him again?

I mean... I was the one who liked him first.

*ANNNNNNNND Back to reality*

YEAH RIGHT!

Maybe it was nervous laughter, but he's the one who did something ambiguous at that point, so it's HIM who's in the wrong!

I'm too jaded to accept his explanation just like that!

And besides... who could possibly fall in love with such a guy TWICE?

So he thinks he's going to make me say "I love you?"

OVER MY COLD, DEAD BODY!

This isn't love. This isn't Love. **THIS CANNOT POSSIBLY BE LOVE!**

_Little did Ritsu know, that this was just the beginning of a whole new story._

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**(A/N) Well there you have it! Chapter 4 everybody! So finally the ball starts rolling on this story! I'm gonna put all my time and effort (except homework of course) into this story. It will become my life! Thank you for reading Chapter 4! Hope to see you all on Chapter 5! **


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